Of All Who Give
by ItsLukasBondevik
Summary: Mathias and Lukas are struggling with what little money they have between them to make this a memorable Christmas for each other, even if it means giving up something precious to them.


This was a secret Santa exchange gift on Tumblr for the-female-macaroni on Tumblr! Her prompt was _A cute Christmas (maybe with baby Emil to make it a cute family Christmas but I don't mind)._ So here it is!

_-.-_

Lukas was warm inside of a shop. His long fingers were brushing gently over fabrics of various textures and qualities, each sewn expertly and diligently into some of the finest coats he'd ever seen in his life. His toddler brother was fast asleep in his arms, his hand gripping at his scarf and snoring very slightly, his silvery blonde hair brushing Lukas's neck as he shifted in his sleep. He hoisted him up higher gently so as not to wake him, biting at his lip as he stared at the coat that he had come every single day for the past fortnight to look at.

It was beautiful. The base was black as pitch, soft as satin but as firm as wool, the inside gentle and warm. It had red trim on the sleeves and decorative, shiny black buttons along the cuff, and every time Lukas saw it he became more and more convinced it was the absolute perfect gift. It matched perfectly to a black cap of the same expensive material that his beloved already owned, with a solid gold button attached that was the same hue as the ones on the coat. He wanted that coat so badly, it would be such a wonderful ensemble if he were to wear it out. He bit his lip as his eyes once again gazed upon the price tag, the cost of it definitely not something he would be able to afford, especially not this Christmas.

But he could see it now. It would replace the ratty old coat that had gotten so much use since their early teens, the faded color and the missing buttons completely outshone by this fantastic piece of clothing. He ached to pull the money out of his wallet and just be done with it, but he couldn't do it. There was still so much that he had to pay for before the holidays and it would be cutting it far too close to drop so much money on something so unnecessary no matter how much he wanted to.

The shop keeper bid him _god nat!_ as he walked out, the bell ringing behind him as the door slammed itself shut. He gripped Emil tighter and sighed, trailing back home on the oft taken route along the canal. Copenhagen was merry this time of year, the houses lit up and the people shopping and singing with one another. It was financially rough for them right now as Mathias was out of work and his job as a school teacher did not pay as much as he wished, but it was not the case for everyone, and he envied the bags that hung from mothers' wrists and from fathers' backs as they laughed with their children.

Emil's gifts had been the first ones to be bought, but he was so stubbornly set on getting that coat for Mathias that despite the fact it was nearly a week until the holiday, he had yet to find an alternative. It was ridiculous to think that he would ever be able to buy it though and settling on it had made almost everything else he saw look bland in comparison to such a gift.

He was the first one home, he noted, as he turned the lights on and gently tucked a blanket around Emil's shoulders as he placed him on the couch. Lukas sighed as he entered the kitchen, digging around for something to munch on while he waited for Mathias to return with the groceries. His mind was still in that warm little shop, still staring at the beautiful coat, still lamenting the fact that he couldn't buy it for him. But there was nothing to be done for it.

The door opened and he turned around to see a very windblown Mathias walk in and while he never let it show on his face, he felt his heart spin somersaults like it always did when he saw the man's face. "You're always home late," he chastised though he didn't really mean it as Mathias walked into the kitchen with the groceries, swooping down to plant a kiss against Lukas's mouth before he began to put things away. Lukas almost put a hand against his chest but he knew it wouldn't still his soaring heart, so he leaned quietly against the frame of the kitchen door, listening to Mathias chatter on about his day and keeping an eye on the still sleeping Emil.

"And I think Mr. Johansson is going to hire me after the holidays," he added at the end, as he wrapped his arms around Lukas's waist and pressed another kiss to his mouth, his goofy smile huge and his sky blue eyes shining. "So we won't have to worry about money so much then."

Lukas leaned against Mathias's chest and sighed deeply, letting the man's heartbeat pulse against his cheek comfortingly. His arms wrapped around his shoulders and they stood for a long moment in the middle of the kitchen without saying a word, and all Lukas could think of is how badly he wanted to get Mathias that coat. "Bror." A small voice broke the silence and Lukas turned around to see Emil rubbing his eyes on the couch, the blanket pooled at his waist and his face slightly red. "I'm hungry."

"Don't worry, Mathias will make dinner," he said as he gently pulled himself from Mathias's arms and sat next to his brother on the couch and pulled the young boy into his lap. Emil leaned back into his chest and played with Lukas's hands as the smells of dinner filled the air from the kitchen. His brother chattered along almost unintelligibly for the better part of an hour and Lukas only half listened, interjecting when he needed to though his mind was most definitely somewhere else.

"Hey Emil! Wanna help me set the table?" Mathias called as he glanced around the corner, that dumb smile on his face that Lukas couldn't help but adore and his brother agreed, hopping from Lukas's lap and rushing into the kitchen to put out the place mats, forks and cups. Lukas watched Emil carefully set everything up the way he knew they liked it and headed over to look, ruffling his brother's hair when he finished. "You are the best table setter in all of Scandinavia, I've decided this is going to be a new law," Mathias said seriously as he served up the æggekage he made with big helpings for them all. Lukas poured a glass of milk for Emil and himself, and Mathias opened a beer as they all began to eat in relative silence.

Lukas wasn't sure if it was his fault that the setting seemed so uncertain, though he could tell that Mathias himself also had a lot on his mind. He could wait to ask, though until after Emil had gone to bed for the night. "This is delicious, thank you, Mathias," Lukas said, his voice quiet though he said it every single time Mathias made a meal for them. The man felt like he wasn't doing anything to help their little family since he had lost his job, and Lukas made a point to praise him for every little thing he did to help around the house.

As usual, the praise worked wonders on his mood, setting a smile brighter than the entire city across Mathias's face as he looked proudly at his dinner. "Thanks a lot Lukas," he replied with egg in his mouth before taking a swig of his beer and swallowing it all in one go. Lukas rolled his eyes and mopped up a small mess on the side of Emil's face, mostly just giving himself something to do with his hands as he wasn't all that hungry.

The rest of the night went slowly, as Lukas read and Mathias played with Emil and his tin soldiers until he fell asleep sitting up against Mathias's chest on the floor. "You seem pretty quiet. Quieter than usual I mean," Mathias mentioned after putting Emil to bed and sitting next to him on the couch, wrapping his arm around Lukas's shoulders. He leaned back into Mathias, staring off at nothing for a moment before shrugging.

"It's the holidays and we don't have very much money," he replied, closing his eyes as Mathias's fingers drew circles on the back of his hand. "I just want Emil to have everything he wants, and I can't do that for him." He neglected to mention the coat, his fingers tightening into a fist as he thought about. Mathias pressed a kiss to the back of his head and rested his chin in the crook of his neck.

He replied, "Don't worry about that, _elskling_. Emil's a happy kid, he'll be okay with whatever Santa brings him." There was a moment of silence as Mathias pressed several kisses up Lukas's neck. "And so will I." He turned around in Mathias's arms, doubting that sentence more severely, but wrapping his arms around Mathias's neck and kissing him furiously on the mouth.

…

Mathias left early that morning to go talk to Mr. Johansson about the job offer, and Lukas was digging around in his small box of keepsakes. The idea had come to him last night as he was falling asleep, curled up against Mathias's chest, and he realized it was the perfect idea. He pulled out a golden hairpin, one that had been in that box for years and that he hadn't been able to wear because it was broken. He bit his lip, knowing that Mathias had given it to him when they were barely children in school but he was sure the man had long since forgotten about it.

He stuffed it in his pocket and gathered up Emil in coat, mittens and scarf. Locking the door behind them, he hurried down the street against the cold with the pin clenched tightly in his mittened fist. Emil was whining about the walk, but he ignored him as they entered into a jeweler's shop. "God morgen!" the man at the counter greeted as Lukas pulled off his gloves. "How can I help you today young man?" Lukas placed the broken hairpin on the counter without a word, pained feelings of loss chipping away at him. The man picked it up and examined it, and nodded slowly. "For sale?"

"Yes."

"All right. I'll give you a fair price for this. It's in very good condition but the clasp is broken, though that is an easy fix." The man counted out the kroner and handed them to Lukas, who put the money carefully in his wallet and stiffly walked out of the store. It was strange, he felt like he had given away a part of his body rather than just a broken hairclip. He felt an ache in his chest that baffled him, and he quickly turned down the street to the clothing shop, praying that the coat was still there.

Emil was silent, looking at his brother in concern as they burst into the shop, nearly startling the woman who owned it. "Oh, Lukas!" she greeted him. "Weren't you just here yesterday?"

"I was. I'm here to buy this coat." He walked over to the display where it was hanging and noticed that right above it on a hook was a matching cap, very similar to the one he remembered Mathias having, with a shiny gold button right on the front. Frowning slightly because he could not remember it being there before, he counted his money quickly and found that he had just enough for both items. "I'll buy this hat as well. Though, tell me, is it new?"

The woman nodded. "A gentleman sold it to me just this morning, actually. It's made of the same material as the coat, and I thought it would look nice if they were worn together so I bought it from him for a fair price." Lukas nodded and paid for the items with the money he got from the pin, carrying the bag along with him almost guiltily. He just wanted Mathias to have something new, even though he had a hat that almost matched he wasn't quite sure if it were a perfect fit. This way though, he would have something that matched for sure.

"Bror?" Emil asked quietly, tugging on Lukas's jacket as they entered back into their house. "Why are you crying?" Lukas shook his head and wiped the tears from his face, tucking the back with the coat away from sight of the main room.

"I'm okay, Emil. Don't worry about me."

…

Mathias stared into a local shop, his eyes focused very perceptively on one of the items in the window. It was shiny, it was golden and it was one of the loveliest things he'd ever seen. It was a brand new, solid gold hair clip that was meant as an attachment for a hair piece, lying daintily on a purple satin cushion in the window of the shop with several others of its kind. His brows were furrowed as he pressed his forehead against the glass, his breath fogging it over as he frowned. It wasn't exactly in his price range, in fact it was probably a couple hundred dollars out of his price range, but the moment he laid eyes on it he knew he had to have it.

The one that came to mind was unworn and tucked away, given as a gift when they were children and still in the possession of the receiver, but unworn as the clasp had long since broken. His mouth was skewed in a frown as he thought of the current pin, expensive and beautiful and timeless, and how he wished so badly that he could replace the broken clip on it with a new one. Especially a new one that was the same look and glamor rather than any ratty metal fastener that he could buy at a jewelry shop. Almost habitually, he checked his wallet though he already knew he was short by over half the price he needed to buy it.

Finally sighing and turning away from the shop, he tugged his paper sacks of groceries back home, morosely thinking about how someone would buy those clasps sooner rather than later as it was so close to Christmas, and he would never be able to give it as a gift himself. He would never be able to attach it to the pin and make it wearable again. He nearly flushed as he remember how Lukas used to wear it every single day until it broke, how he used to give it a gentle brush of his fingers whenever they spoke to each other about anything at all. He sighed, just thinking of it making him melancholy, and he gripped the grocery bags tighter.

The walk home was cold and the sound of the water lapping against the canal was soothing, an incredibly calming and homey sound that always brought him peace despite lamenting over that pin. He brushed his hair back away from his face with his free hand, knowing it was probably wild but he secretly liked it that way, even though Lukas told him constantly that he looked like he walked out of a rain storm. He listened to his boots as they clacked against the streets, and followed the little road up to the front door of his home.

The lights were already on when he entered, and he saw Emil fast asleep on the couch with a blanket wrapped around his shoulders."You're always home late." He looked to the kitchen and saw Lukas standing there, his arms crossed over his chest but his face completely stoic, though Mathias couldn't help but feel a smile creep over his mouth. He leaned down to press a wet kiss against his lover's lips and began to place the groceries away in the kitchen. It was always so wonderful to come home to Lukas and know he could kiss him whenever he pleased.

"I got a everything on the list this time, and guess what? I paid for it all with the money I earned helping Mr. Johansson with the bar today," he said, feeling pride swelling in his chest. He'd lost his job as a newspaper editor only a couple of months ago when the paper went out of business, and it'd been difficult to find something new. But there were plenty of people around town who needed someone to assist with fixing something or putting together the odds and ends of do-it-yourself jobs that they weren't sure how to finish.

Lukas pressed a grateful kiss to Mathias's neck and he flushed with pride as he handed back the kroner that he had taken from him earlier that morning. "And I think Mr. Johansson is going to hire me after the holidays," he said excitedly, pulling Lukas into a tight hug and kissing him one more time. "So we won't have to worry about money so much then." The relief was very evident on Lukas's face, and Mathias lifted him from the ground and pressed a few more kisses to his cheeks. Throughout the rest of the night though, his mind was still on that golden clasp, while he made dinner, while he played with Emil, while they talked until Lukas fell asleep.

He couldn't get it out of his thoughts, and he wanted nothing more than to buy it for him. As they laid in bed, Mathias holding Lukas to his chest as he breathed gently against his skin, he combed the man's fine blond hair back with his fingers, his mouth skewed into a frown. Lukas's skin was soft and lovely in the dim moonlight, and he could help but feel his heart swell with love at the sight of his face resting against his chest. He wanted to do something special for him, and no matter how hard he worked Mathias just couldn't do this one thing. It was breaking his heart.

He sighed and rested his chin atop Lukas's head, taking one more glance around the room before deciding to fall asleep. But his eyes caught something, a glimmer in the closet, and he recognized his cap that was sitting on the shelf. It hadn't been worn in a long time, since he had nothing really to wear it with, and he recalled it being an expensive gift to him from Lukas years ago when they had more money. The button on it was real gold, and the materials were of the highest quality. He bit his lip, knowing that he never wore it and that Lukas would probably not even recall gifting it.

With his mind made up, Mathias allowed himself to fall asleep.

…

"I'm going to Mr. Johansson's to ask about that job," he whispered right against Lukas's ear, his mouth against the blond hair that draped over his cheek. Lukas grunted back, not fully awake and Mathias kissed his forehead before tucking the little cap into his pocket and leaving the house quietly. The morning was barely breaking and he was almost a sad, but he knew it was for the best. He would sell the hat, go talk to Mr. Johansson, and then return afterward to the jewelry shop to pick up the pin clasp and all would be well.

Just in time for Christmas.

He walked into the nearest clothing shop warily, uncertain of how much he should even ask for the cap let alone how much it was really worth. But the woman at the counter seemed nice enough and she took the cap and examined it for a moment before offering him much more than he was even expecting for it. "It'll go with this coat," she explained, motioning to one of their displayed items. "This is in perfect condition and it'll match perfectly. It's almost a miracle that you came in today!" Mathias thanked her gratuitously, his fingers shaking around the money as he stuffed the bills into his wallet.

His talk with Mr. Johansson was short, sweet and in the end, positive. After the holidays he would have a job for certain and he couldn't wait to tell Lukas. All of their problems were over, and he would be able to help again. But it was walking into the jewelry that made his wary, staring at the purple satin cushion in the window only to find that a golden hairclip was sitting there instead of the clasps. It was almost identical to the one that Lukas had, solid gold and shiny, with a perfectly usable clasp attached to it. "Hello, there!" the man behind the register greeted, making his way over to Mathias and looking down where his vision was fixated. "Have a lovely lady to gift, sir?"

"Something like that," he mused, picking up the clip and weighing it in his hand. It was a few more kroner than just the replacement clasp, but this way Lukas would have something that was brand new, rather than something that was older than his own brother. "I'll take this one, please." He gave the man the money and quickly left the building, his heart racing as he wrapped the little clip up carefully in a bag to keep it from getting lost. He knew Lukas would like it, finally able to wear the decorative clip that used to be in his hair from morning til night when it was still in working condition. Eventually he would get the old one fixed, but he'd rather get something new for him for Christmas.

…

"We did well," Lukas said as he stepped over his snoring younger brother, laying in the middle of the floor with wrapping paper nearly consuming him. Mathias nodded setting his camera on the coffee table as Lukas curled up onto the couch next to him, allowing Mathias to put an arm around his shoulders and pull him closer.

Mathias said, pressing a kiss to Lukas's forehead, "Let's let the kid sleep for a while. I want to give you your gift from me." He nodded and Mathias reached behind the couch for a small box, wrapped in decorative paper with a ridiculously large bow on top. "God jul, Lukas," he said, pressing the box into his hands and kissing him on the mouth as he did. Lukas reached behind him and pulled a bag out with colored paper hiding it's contents.

"And mine for you." Lukas's smile was almost enough of a gift that he couldn't imagine needing anything else in the world right at that moment. They both silently looked at the gifts, wondering if opening them would ruin the magic of that moment, but Mathias shot Lukas a grin and began to take the paper out, so Lukas began to unwrap the little box. The silence was deafening as they stared into the packages, then to each other, and then back to the packages again. "But..." Lukas said with a frown, pulling the clip from the box and examining it closely.

"I wanted to get you a new one, since yours broke," he offered with a small smile.

Lukas shook his head. "No, no, this _is _mine. Look." He turned it around and engraved on the back was the very familiar, often used phrase of _Jeg elsker deg, Lukas _carved into the metal_._ Mathias's jaw dropped a little bit and he stared at the clip for a moment, unsure of what to say. Lukas seemed almost flustered, staring down at this hands nervously. "I sold it last week so get your gift." His eyebrows raised in shock and he looked back down into the bag, pulling out a beautiful coat with red trim from inside.

"Lukas," he said quietly, pressing his hand to his mouth and standing up from the couch. He reached out and tugged Lukas into a tight embrace, his eyes prickling with tears. "You didn't have to do that for me." Leaning back he gently pulled the clip from Lukas's hand and clipped it easily into his hair, pushing the bangs back and cupping his cheeks. "And you look beautiful." Lukas rolled his eyes as he moved Mathias's hands from his cheeks, his eyes a little glassy as he unbuttoned his ratty winter coat. With a little help he got the new one on Mathias, fastening the gold buttons and flattening down the collar.

"And you look handsome," he noted as he pecked Mathias's cheek before reaching down into the bag and pulling out one last thing. "I know you already have one like this, but it went with the coat, so I got it too." Mathias's brows furrowed as he took the hat from Lukas, the familiar gold button on the front reflecting a distorted image of his water eyes before he finally felt the tears drip down his cheeks. Alarmed, Lukas reached up to hold his face, uncertain of what to say and Mathias started to laugh loudly.

He said, his voice cracking, "I sold this to buy your new pin." They both stared at each other for a moment, Lukas's expression of surprise barely evident on his usually expressionless visage. Finally, he started to laugh. It was like the the clanging of bells first thing in the morning on Sunday and it had been a long time since Mathias had heard it. Lukas jumped into his arms, still laughing, nearly crushing him in his embrace, pressing his fingers against the pin in his hair. He felt a dampness on his neck but chose to pretend that it wasn't there, not sure if seeing Lukas cry was something he was emotionally ready to handle.

"I love you," he said quietly, leaning back and brushing Mathias's hair away from his face, his damp cheeks red but his smile so bright that he was almost overwhelmed by the sight of it. "Merry Christmas Mathias."


End file.
